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Making peace in the hive – a Queen bee’s perspective

Recently worked with a young woman leader, Sasha*, who was having a very hard time managing her male team member, Manu*. Culturally, gender has been known to play a large part in how a woman boss is accepted by her male colleagues. To add fuel to the fire, Sasha had been his peer till a couple of weeks previous. HR nominated her for a quick-fix coaching, wanting to ensure the safety of the account.

The beauty about our type of intervention is that we didn’t need both parties to be present to resolve this conflict, nor did we need the details of the challenges she perceived.

Her feedback:

“I honestly thought it was awesome! Though I only had one NLP session, I believe it was useful in so many ways. Firstly, I believe that just the fact that you have to take one hour out of your hectic schedule to be in a quiet, peaceful, and stress free environment makes a great impact on your day/week. Also, though it is a technique completely different than anything I’ve experienced, it was more practical than anything I’ve experienced.

In my case, we analysed a situation that happened which I would’ve liked that the outcome would’ve been different. We went through that same situation several times and looked at it from several perspectives. This exercise of going through the situation several times (and in a very quiet and peaceful environment) and playing different roles in the “movie,” enabled me to realize what I was doing wrong (or what I would’ve liked to have done differently) and gave me the courage to do it right (or differently) next time.

It’s going to sound weird, but it empowered me in a sense that I now feel that I can take control of a similar situation and say or do the things that I want in order to have the outcome that I want (I feel more brave and less scared to say/do what I think). I believe that in a work environment like ours (very stressful and hectic), this exercise enables you to just stop for a moment and re-think things in order to do them correctly. I would definitely recommend this to everyone I know.”

*names changed for privacy